‘About me’ Category

  1. Getting too serious!

    February 22, 2012 by admin

    I was horrified when I found out that Mum reads this drivel that I turn out pretty much every day.

    Sis had referred to it at some stage and with her interest piqued Mum must have just searched for Chris Evans, and after pages of the ginger one she must have found me.

    But the funny part of that is that she didn’t actually let on until last night when she told me that the posts in my internet diary as she calls it are demonstrating that I’m settling down a bit at last, even if I don’t have a girlfriend.

    It’s true I guess. At first I was writing in the laddish style that I like to think I live my life, but fact is I’m in my 30s and getting tired out after a night on the town. I still love the girls though – can’t imagine that changing.

    The folks are in town tonight for a show and staying at the Jesmond Dene it’s a London Bed and Breakfast place near Kings Cross that they took a liking to a while back. They know a few of the team there now and it’s certainly better than trying to put them up at my place. It takes me an age to tidy up before they come, and then I can’t find anything for weeks. If I don’t tidy up you can see mum just itching to do the dishes, fold my clothes, put cds back in their cases and the like, and if she does it then I definitely won’t find anything afterwards.

    Hopefully there’ll be a curry to be had after their show. That’s the usual shape of things, ideally a south Indian they like just off TCR.

    Category About me, Hotels and accommodation, Work | Tags: | No Comments

  2. Blogging

    January 19, 2012 by admin

    Hey. I’ve been at this blogging business for a few weeks now and I thought I’d explore some of my own thoughts on the subject.

    One of the main things is that I’ve realised that I can’t type the word “THE”. I hadn’t realised that every time I type it in word it corrects my spelling from teh to the automatically. That’s all very well and dandy, but because I was only vaguely aware of it the mistake has become so ingrained that I’m finding it really hard to break out of.

    OK, that’s one thing. the other is that getting sat down and writing pretty much every day is a whole lot easier than just doing it when you think you have something to say – hence the rather random nature of some of my posts!

    Getting set up was easy. I was told to use WordPress and so I did. I needed a WordPress hosting company and was told to use 34sp because they are good, easy to deal with, and sensibly priced. So I did that too. Most unlike me to do what I was told twice in a row. And I’m reaping the benefits as it’s easier than an easy thing.

    What’s difficult is remembering to only speak my mind to a certain degree as the moment you start telling people you write a blog, the silly beggars go looking for it and then reading it and then. Then they get a little uppetty if you’ve been a tad too open in describing their antics. Or worse than that your mother (Hi Mum) reads it because your annoying if lovely sister showed her how. And then even your dad isn’t safe.

    So I try to make a rule of all clean fun. Well. Sort of.

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  3. Catch up

    January 17, 2012 by admin

    Oops, I’ve been slipping and haven’t written a jot in nearly a week. But there hasn’t been that much going on. I’m cutting back spending a little to try to clear the Christmas credit card in just one foul swoop, so I’m behaving, running in the mornings and not getting so drunk (notice I didn’t mention anything daft like stopping drinking).

    I’ve been home to the folks at the weekend to help dad put up some smart wooden venetian blinds in their living room. It’s a big, bright and airy room that everyone loves, but in the winter when the sun is low you can’t see in there as it’s just too bright on a sunny day. Up go the blinds and suddenly there’s control wrestled back from nature. Dad just wanted someone to be there I reckon as he’s completely capable. Holding the end up at times was just about worth going for, but mother could have done that.

    The big advantage of going there is I’ve been fed like a king, and only spent a few quid on the train fare rather than a small fortune in the boozer had I stayed at home.

    The cold snap has been great in the mornings. Going for a 30 minute run is superb in the crisp air, provided you don’t take a tumble of course. I feel really quite virtuous!

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  4. Shed world

    January 11, 2012 by admin

    Thinking about Dad’s shed or garden room yesterday got me going off on a wonderful dream trip whereby I bought a plot somewhere – ideally with a small garden space and a view (but who doesn’t want that).

    I set myself a size restriction of 55 square metres for the building, then like a school boy drew up my own graph paper and planned my space. 55 metres is small, and that was the challenge, to create a wow space in a little space.

    Storage is going to be important, can’t have stuff all over the place. I reckon a big shelving and hanging wardrobe for pretty much everything including clothes, bedding, towels, filing, all that crap that goes with life.

    Super king bed. Essential.

    Small but not tiny bathroom with a mega shower although no bath.

    Then an open plan living space over about 35 square metres. Small but functional kitchen, wall bed for mates to be comfortable if staying, but no so comfortable they want to stay too often.

    This is coming on a treat!

    Maybe I finally have something to aim for.

    £100k for a plot. Maybe £50k for the world’s best shed.

    Come on!

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  5. Monday, oh Monday, how I love to rise on Monday!

    December 19, 2011 by admin

    What a horrible day.

    It’s cold out.

    It’s wet.

    It’s windy.

    So no matter how you prepare for going outside it won’t be good enough. Best move is to stay in.

    I hate wearing a big coat in London, but that’s what being outside calls for in London today. A great big flowing drama queen’s coat. I’ve got one. It’s lovely, and I look a dude in it, but I rarely wear it.

    You see the trouble is your are not often outside for long in London. If you go into a shop you start cooking in no time. If you but stuff then you have to carry it so your temperature goes up. And if it really rains then the cost is likely to weigh a ton in no time.

    No. The big coat is best saved for dramatic striding across Hampstead Heath, ideally with a freezing fog. And you have to wear a big hat. A fedora or something of that ilk.

    Later I’ve got my sis’s son coming around to talk through an essay he’s trying to write. I hope I can help, but chances are we’ll end up using coursework.info where you can get loads of example essays online. What he’s really coming around for is to have a beer or two. Sis doesn’t let him drink at home, and I have to say I agreed with her on that when we discussed the topic, but that doesn’t mean he can’t have a little glass or two with Chris does it?

    I can’t remember whether we drank at home when we were kids. I doubt it somehow, the folks don’t touch the stuff much even now.

    Category About me, London | Tags: | No Comments

  6. Married? Divorced? Single?

    September 23, 2011 by admin

    Yeah! Bring ‘em on!

    Oh! Me? Well yes, I’m a single guy and happy that way.

    It might not last for ever, but from where I’m looking it doesn’t seem like any of my mates in long term relationships are having as good a time as me.

    They have a go at me and say it’s time to settle down, but I know they are all jealous. And I know most of their girlfriends wouldn’t mind waking up with Mr Evans just for a laugh now and then either. I know I might not be good for people, but I think they like me that way. Like smoking, fast driving, gambling, shagging your mate’s missus when he’s downstairs, it’s all a bit of excitement.

    It might not be harmless, in fact it does sometimes cause pain, but until someone actually turns up with a gun I can’t imagine changing. And then the change will be mine – I’ll have to be brave for the first time and kick the crap outta whichever daft git tries to have me.

    Look. I love women, I love them excited and feeling a little dangerous. I don’t want to know about their problems and there’s not one yet who’d I’d want to see every day for a month. (That was going to just say every day for a week, then I thought of some of the fab holidays I’ve had here and there). I don’t apologise for this, it’s how I am, and I think it’s how a load more blokes would be if they had the balls.

    When I was out earlier on my bike I was assaulted/accompanied by a huge great Mercedes wagon with one of these cow parade cows on the room, except this one had studio monitor horn speakers instead of a mouth and it was blaring out some pretty cool clubbing tunes near the university. It was an ad for a club, and a pretty cool one at that. But ladies and gentlemen I draw the line at going to student clubs on the pull.

    However if they approach me…

    Category About me, Marital status | Tags: | No Comments

  7. Fitness and the Evans Miester.

    September 22, 2011 by admin

    My body is no temple, but I do work out a fair bit. I pound the streets bloody early because I don’t want anyone I know to see me all hot and sweaty, well, not from running anyway. And I do weights a few times a week at home, nothing silly mind you, I’ve just got a few free weights and a bench.

    Doing the weights used to mean cranking the tunes up like crazy – some old fast electronica perhaps, or a bit of moderately heavy rock. Nowadays it’s headphones to avoid having too many rows with the twats on either side of the flat.

    If I’m out running I don’t have music on. I think that’s a bit dumb. It makes me laugh to see a couple out running together and they both have their headphones on. What’s the point. Unless he’s a complete softee he’ll want to run a whole lot faster than her anyway so even running together seems daft to me. I suppose he won’t hear her pecking at his head that way though.

    So I look like I’m in good shape, but under those glistening muscles a tortured soul hides its pain. And ladies, only you can help me through!

    The best exercise (other than the obvious) is skiing in my book. Absolutely love it. I know boarding is so much more cool, but look at it this way – if all the kids are off boarding, then I’m doing something a bit different to them, so who’s cool now? And I love swimming, but not in a pool, I fookin hate chlorine, it makes my eyes look like piss holes in the snow, so I don’t do it. Just the sea, and occasionally lakes if I get the chance.

    Category About me, Fitness | Tags: | No Comments

  8. Modesty suits me not.

    September 21, 2011 by admin

    Hey folks, from my opening salvo I trust none of you are under any illusion with regard to my modesty. I don’t ham it up, I tell it as I see it. Though often are the times that drink may slightly obscure that vision and what I think I see may not be the whole story.

    I’m a lucky guy and I push my luck. Old Churchill must have spent a whole lotta time thinking up his supposedly spontaneous remarks, and there are loads of them I wish I could even remember, right now one springs to mind with regard to pushing your luck, he said “Never let the truth get in the way of a good story”. I love that don’t you? Kinda like a Hollywood film might say at the end “Based on a true story”. That’s a bit how I see my life.

    There’s always enough truth for a story to be corroborated by any of the characters to a sufficient degree for the reader or listener to be satisfied with the ‘facts’. But if I say I was shagging for an hour and a half, well for god’s sake have the sense to realise that it was a long shag, it wasn’t necessarily timed to the second. And after all no one lasts that long outside the films anyway.

    Here’s a fact. I’m 35. Fact. Like I was born 35 years ago.

    How old do I look? I don’t really care as long as I look good enough. And here goes for an Evans theory – guys can look great as they get older a whole lot easier than women can. There are some great looking old guys with faces full of character and pulling the girls still too. With a woman you can look at her and see that she had killer looks once, and she’ll probably still move better than most, but few actually look better as they grow older.

    Oh Christ! If anyone reads this then I’m in a whole lotta trouble for that statement. But that’s another Evans thing right there. I won’t care because I’ll love talking my way out of the shit storm I may create – best think of a few good examples first though.

    Actually trying to think of women aging worse than men has already got me into trouble in my head. I can think of three friends’ wives/girlfriends who have started running in their mid to late 30’s. lost a few pounds, and started looking great. Scrawn is to be avoided though. One I can think of who I love to bits has started running marathons and got so thin she looks like she may have AIDS or something. Whoa! Another sweet comment there Christopher.

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  9. Will the real Chris Evans please stand up?

    September 20, 2011 by admin


    Isn’t it a pain in the arse? I can hear people thinking it even if they don’t have the balls to say. And it’s a fair point, but it’s wrong.

    Being called Chris Evans has so many advantages.

    I like to think I have plenty of topics of conversation anyway – but being the Chris Evans rather than THE Chris Evans means that even the shyest person automatically has something to talk about, or at least ask about.

    Does that mean that having a name that some other guy is lucky enough to share with me has brought me advantages? Oh hell yes!

    Is it the greatest gift my parents have me, albeit by accident?

    Well, I guess I ought to say some bollx like “they gave me the gift of life”, but screw that! If they didn’t have me in the first place there’d be no basis for conversation anyway. So, yes, my name and my rather fine member are their greatest gifts to me, and maybe the Mark I Golf GTi when I had just passed my driving test.

    Hey for fooks sake, I’ve even said thank you. Though admittedly I was drunk and I had thrown up on the way home from a party in dad’s car just before I offered up my humble thanks for the gifts they’d bestowed upon me. I’m sure they know I’m grateful anyway, but maybe one day I should contemplate this idea and perhaps test the water with them before they pop off, you know, a little – “Hey mum, you do know that I think you did me well don’t you?”

    All these little things add up to make me the shag monster I am (or like to think that I am). And, like a Big Mac, with hot, crispy fries fresh from the sizzling oil, “I’m lovin’ it! Baby!”

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